The Pioneer Woman Pimps Pillsbury

After watching the Pioneer Woman and QVC’s David Venable make blithering fools of themselves promoting her new book, I decided to research one of its more vile concoctions:  apple dumplings made with Pillsbury crescent rolls and Mountain Dew.  When I Googled the recipe,  over eight thousand results were returned. The ones I reviewed were practically identical to the recipe she’s published on her site and in her faux cookbook being released next week. Here’s a sampling from Google:

Woolworth’s Apple Dumplings

Cook With Betty


It begs the question, what the hell is so special about the Pioneer Woman’s version, that she and HarperCollins have now copyrighted it? With a recipe so widely available on the Internet, what’s the point? Surely the Pioneer Woman could have lifted another dessert, say from one of her usual hometown sources,  Taste of the Territory or Heavenly Fodder.

The Pioneer Woman’s manipulative publicists have been burning the midnight oil as well.  Supplying pro-Pioneer Woman websites with advance copies of the book, they’re hoping for favorable reviews and perhaps a shout-out on Twitter.  The media onslaught and book tour begin next week with stops in New York, Massachusetts and Virginia.  Serious foodies needn’t bother.

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51 Responses to The Pioneer Woman Pimps Pillsbury

  1. Michele says:

    I… uh… wow there are no words for how repellent that apple crescent roll recipe is to me. Mountain Dew? Packaged dough? And it can be found all over the internet. No wonder obesity/hyperactivity/ADHD/diabetes and more are at epidemic levels in this country–people like Ree are promoting this kind of food to the masses and it makes people think it’s no big deal to put junk like this into their bodies. It seriously bums me out. :(

    • jill says:

      I believe “gross” is the word. perhaps “repugnant”. wet whomp dough with a slice of apple. blech

  2. Mary Beth says:

    The promo hype is gearing up for tomorrow’s launch on the 13th. Her friend Alice chimes in.

  3. Bee says:

    I really don’t understand Jaden’s fawning of Ree. I think she must get kick backs.

  4. Margaret Barry says:

    My comment on her show did not make the cut and was replaced at # 92 by enthusiastic praise for Ree’s skill in frying food for her kids. Blech.

    Could anyone explain to me the point of freezing canned fruit and then thawing it out? And has anyone noticed that it doesn’t seem like much is cooked in real time, and may not even be cooked by her as there are an awful (emphasis on awful) lot of closeups of mixers or frying pans with no hands or interaction of any kind….is it possible that she can’t even cook her lame recipes for fried steak, fried eggs, and fried potatoes?

    I have also noticed that her kids seem downright uncomfortable and wary around her….could be the presence of cameras, but they seem to spend way more time with the dad, and appear to be reasonably at ease doing the outdoor segments. Why is it though, that the same insipid questions are asked over and over again with the same yes responses…..? Are you ready to ….eat? Ride? Cut trees? Buy clothes? Are there no real writers who can script a conversation that goes beyond monosyllabic affirmations of what we have already been repeatedly informed is” going on on the ranch today.” Or is this the way this family communicates?

    Thanks, Marlboro Woman, for providing a forum to discuss the sham that is this empire. I am embarrassed to admit that I have logged on the PW site more times than I can mention just to win some fab cookware. I never could stand to read her, but did not think until recently about my participation in driving her numbers up by just trying to win a prize. No more. The whole thing is just too gross.

    • The Marlboro Woman says:

      Welcome, we were all there at one point.

    • SSK says:

      I’ve read that of all the cooking shows on FN (and probably others as well) Rachael Ray’s 30 Minute Meals is the only one actually cooked in “real time.”

      • Paula S. says:

        I haven’t watched cooking shows on FN, but I used to watch Marcia Adams and Justin Wilson on PBS, and occasionally catch someone on there now, and used to see Martha Stewart. It was standard for the cook to show doing a lot to the dish on the show, but have a finished dish to show already prepared because there isn’t time to let something finish cooking. Is PW not doing that much? I don’t have cable.

      • Mary Beth says:

        In the late 1990’s Sara Moulton hosted Cooking Live on FN when she and a viewer would cook together via satellite and phone in real time. It was interesting and sometimes they barely finished by sign-off time.

      • Margaret Barry says:

        Real time wasn’t really my point. It looks like she’s not really cooking. The lodge was built with the capacity to film cooking, but you don’t actually see her doing that. She talks, they cut away to shots of pans, or mixers, or things going into the oven, but it does not read like she is cooking. And who bakes biscuits ahead of time? They are the easiest quickbread you can possibly make, ubiquitous to the south and midwest, but in her blog she showcases “popinfresh ” because that is what MM likes???? And then she makes biscuits the night before and heats them up? Ick. I am from NY but lived in the south for many years, no real cook of country food would ever use canned biscuits or heat up biscuits from the night before. Her poor children. Clearly the game plan is to kill MM early with her cooking so she can take the money, and her dubious fame to return to her exciting life in LA while she leaves those damn kids she had to have with her Mom and Hyacinth.

        • samantha says:

          I felt the same way watching her show…..they don’t really show her doing much and the show I saw had weird camera angles like they didn’t really want to show what it all looked like. For someone that ‘got famous’ for taking a photo of a steak for her blog, and had 1000s of shots of chopping an onion, food pics are really few and far between. But she is a FAKE so what do we expect?

        • jill says:

          yer kiddin me. she made biscuits ahead of time? no way. biscuits are easy peasy and meant to be eaten fresh ‘n hot, straight from the oven with butter and honey, or butter and molasses, or sausage gravy. no true southerner eats old cold biscuits, and the whomp biscuits (refridgerator tubes meant to be whomped on the counter) are just nasty. either way, once biscuits go cold, feed them to the chickens.

        • Debbie says:

          Oh, honey, you have never tasted my biscuits! They have been approved by the American Hockey Association. I can cook pretty much anything except a good biscuit.

          • jill says:

            come on over I’ll teach you how to make heavenly biscuits. yum. but don’t you ever let me catch you reheating them because that’s just wrong.

  5. Paula S. says:

    Never in my life have I known of anyone cooking eggs in oil. That seems really gross. I can make good looking eggs, any style, in just a little butter in a non stick pan. But even eggs cooked in a little of the bacon grease the way the older people in my family did seems far less disgusting than in oil.

    • SSK says:

      I agree. I was surprised she didn’t cook them in a lot of butter.

    • poppycorn says:

      Actually, cooking eggs in a touch of olive oil is delicious (see Stanley Tucci in Big Night) I saw her eggs and was appalled! Those eggs were swimming in oil. I have never seen or heard of anything like that!

    • Debbie says:

      That seemed so vile. I would rather my eggs by healthy, than pretty.

  6. vera charles says:

    Does the Beantown Baker blogger realize how stupid she sounds? She’s all excited because Ree’s publicist sent her a book and she opened it to a strawberry shortcake recipe that her husband made in 2010. No, that isn’t some cosmic sign that she and Ree are soulmates. It’s a sign that the book is filled with already-published recipes!

  7. Sherry in AZ says:

    So I couldn’t help myself…I had to see what she was up to. I am thoroughly grossed out by her oil-based eggs and barely cooked steak bites. Nasty stuff!

  8. NG says:

    Wow! The Inspired Room is truly cringe-worthy, or maybe even vomit-worthy in the over-the-top imitation of the “PW” style. I actually had to read it twice. She must really be desperate for an identity – desperate enough to assume Ree’s.

    • The Marlboro Woman says:

      The “PW style” wasn’t invented by Ree, like her recipes, she stole it from other blogs. Ree doesn’t have an original bone in her body.

  9. Alphachild says:

    I just told them No thanks. I will just get the recipes off the internet. I wonder how long it will be before my post gets deleted.

  10. Jody says:

    I know that this is off-topic, but today Ree has a post about making sunny-side up eggs.
    Really? Eggs? Are you freaking kidding me?
    Sweet Jaysus, next thing you know she’ll be ‘teaching’ us how to boil water.

    • SSK says:

      I get an email from Leanne Ely at Saving Dinner. In today’s email there were reader questions. One reader wanted to know what a clove of garlic was and how did you get it out of the papery skin (or do you need to remove it?) and another wanted to know how to chop green onions. Apparently there are many people who have little clue.

    • mollys says:

      My feed comes in about a day later than you’alls (sorry my b’ville non-country club roots came out) but those eggs were nasty looking. and the steakbites were appalling… I did record the tv show today and will have to have plenty of the medicinal vodka to watch it later… but in reading the drivel leading up to the eggs she readily admitted that her family and the drummonds were generation friends, now I seem to recall from that sham of a book tractor ruts and slutty heels she didnt know the rich and famous drummonds….or was I under the influence of the medicinal vodka again?

      • Paula S. says:

        The way I understood the post, her family and Hyacinth’s family had been friends for generations. However, she could not possibly have grown up in that part of OK and never have heard of the Drummonds. When she agreed to meet MM, (it was an arranged meeting, not accidental as the book says, according to locals who have posted on here), she would have had to know who he was.

        • SSK says:

          The way I understood it was that their husband’s families had been friends for years.

          • Paula S. says:

            I went back and looked again. You are right. It didn’t all soak in when I read it at an unusually early hour this a.m.

        • mollys says:

          my point exactly, if you live in this part of Oklahoma you know who the Dummonds are…

    • karen says:

      I have never in my life seen anybody poach eggs in oil. Because that’s what she’s doing. NASTY. Seriously, who gives a rip if their eggs look like play food?

  11. Bridget says:

    Her book tour makes a stop in Pittsburgh. I am so tempted to show up in a PW Sux shirt especially if the local news is there covering the event.

  12. Mary Beth says:

    I just read on AOL that Trisha Yearwood, one of the judges on her throwdown with Bobby Flay, is going to have a cooking show on Food Network. As if there weren’t already enough recipes for fried chicken and mac and cheese. It evidently pays to suck up to Ree.

    • SSK says:

      Her show and PW’s were announced at the same time. It’s taken longer to develop — maybe because of her other career.

  13. Amber says:

    I’ve never heard of the inspired room, but I checked it out. The first thing I noticed was her little blurp to the side about how she likes to share simple DIY ideas for loving the home you have on a small budget, then shows you a picture of a $10 each spice jar. You could easily make chalkboard paint (in any color I might add) and paint your own jars for a fraction of that cost. The instructions to do so are all over pinterest.

    Oh, and she must not pay too much attention to Ree, that or I don’t, which may be the case, but if Ree got fresh from the Ranch eggs, you’d think she’d be highlighting that crap each and every time she said egg.

  14. Bridget says:

    It seems the Food Network is giving away a copy of her cookbook and as Marlboro Woman pointed out, what is the point of owning her cookbook when all the recipes are online. I can’t believe she has actually inspired people to cook.

    Oh yeah one other thing about the Inspired Room, she wanted to buy about five or six butter dishes because you can never have enough butter. Amen. I can’t imagine anyone really buys her bullshit. I think that most bloggers who emulate her style are seeing her success and are trying to copy her so their blog will become successful. Plus fawning all over her and mentioning her name might draw people to their sites. Or get them invited to the LODGE.

    • Sue M. says:

      And the “fan gurls” are out in force on the FN blog. You can tell her appeal is to the lowest common denominator based on the spelling of some of the comments.

  15. Heidi says:

    A little off topic, but how does the crescent roll recipe on the actual Pillsbury website spell “crescent” wrong? How does that even happen?

  16. Mary Beth says:

    May I add two more who are touting the book. One from The Inspired Room and of course her good
    buddy Jaden Hare at Steamy Kitchen.

    • The Marlboro Woman says:

      Isn’t Jaden the one she invited to the ranch a couple months ago? Ree’s suck fest is so transparent.

    • Bridget says:

      The Inspired Room blog made me vomit. She is trying waayyyy to hard to sound like PW. It was so gross. First she is peddling Ree’s “cookbook” and how it inspired her to buy crap from Antropologie. Talking about some dumbass milk measuring cup was straight off the ranch and how Ree would want her to have cute measuring cups. It was so ridiculous. It almost seemed like a parody of PW’s site. There is a website that mocks Antropologie it is outrageous describtions and the huge price tag for bullshit items. It is great.